I don't know when it started. Maybe that day he stayed after the seminar to ask my opinion — though he could have asked someone more experienced. Or when he found my article in the collection and said he read it "with interest." His voice was calm then, even casual. And my throat tightened, as if I forgot how to breathe.
He's a lecturer. I'm a graduate student. Not his direct student, but we often cross paths: in the department, in the corridor, at conferences. Sometimes I feel like something invisible is happening between us — a glance held a bit too long, a fleeting touch of fingers when we pass papers. Once we left the lecture hall together, and he said he loves the silence in the university after five — and since then, I've stayed late. Just to be nearby. Or maybe to bump into him again.
But then reality sets in. Rules, boundaries, reputations. He can't — shouldn't — take the initiative. And I can't — and am afraid to — make the first move. What if I'm wrong, and he just enjoys chatting with a colleague? What if I come across as intrusive? Or worse, he feels awkward and starts avoiding me.
I respect both him and myself too much to put anyone in an uncomfortable position. But these feelings don't go away. I'm not a child and I'm not romanticizing: I understand how complicated this is. It's an academic environment, everything under a microscope. One wrong step — and rumors, whispers behind the back, lost opportunities.
If only there were a way to know if there's something on his side. Without awkward explanations. Without risking putting an innocent person in a difficult position. So that if there's mutuality — we both understand. And if it's truly just my imagination, I can step back with dignity. Without consequences for him. And for myself.
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